Woven Cognition

Yesterday had me worried and happy all the same.

I know I'm headed for a nervous breakdown even though a lot of times, I feel in control. It's those times when I feel like I'm losing it that are building up and will ultimately do me in in the end.

I'm a major hypochondriac; yesterday I saw a bump under my right wrist beneath my skin. I had no idea what it was. It felt hard, like a bone. But me suffering from intense anxiety, paranoia and being a hypochondriac, I thought it was cancer. I FLIPPED OUT. I thought I was fucking doomed.

I was way stressed yesterday afternoon. My parents and brother were in town. I was home by myself. My fucking dog got ahold of something and was gonna chew it up. So I spent an hour trying to get it away from the bastard. Stupid dog. Bah. He needs to be disciplined. Majorly. I called my mom, asking how to get it away from him, but nothing worked. At one point, she randomly stopped answering the phone and I freaked then, because I was worried something bad happened. It sucks to realize that it's come to that point when something as simple as someone not answering their phone, that I completely freak out.

Before they left, my mom and dad looked at my bump and said it was a vein, but I had my doubts. Well, I eventually got it back from the dog. Luckily it wasn't anything important. They came home and brought me back The OC season three! :D I was psyched. And they also bought me 1600 Microsoft points for Live!

I watched the first disc of season three so far. I wanna stave it off as long as possible until I get season four.. And just my luck, my mom just found an ad for Best Buy that all four seasons are available for $17.. MOTHERFUCKER! I wish I would've known that. Instead of spending $40 or $50 bucks on it. Well, guess I'll get season four sometime this week.. YAY! At least I'll get that for $17..

We ordered from Fox's.. and like the last two times, I coincidentally got a major headache when I ate.. I dunno what it is. Bah. Bad fucking luck. Didn't help that I was still obsessing over the fucking bump. I felt fucking nauseous, so I practically passed out. I woke up a few hours later and I had a sleeping headache, or it was from the one that was coming. Felt like I got shot in the head. Took some pills.

It went away quite fast. I had to decide how I would spend my MP.. I wanted to buy Ecco the Dolphin, Street Fighter II, and the new maps for Halo 3.. which would amount to 2000 points.. I wanted the games more than the maps, so that's what I bought. Good news is, is that I'm only 400 pts away from the new maps as well. :D Unfortunately SFII lags like a mofo on Live. Hopefully it won't always be like that..

FORTUNATELY!!! My mom took another look at the bump on my arm and told me it was a TENDON. I was SO FUCKING RELIEVED! I KNEW it felt like a bone. I asked her why it was so pronounced, she tells me it's because I'm a guy, but I told her there was no bump on my other arm and that it wasn't always like that and she suggested it was inflamed. Which made sense because my hand had been hurting after playing a lot of Tekken 2 the night before and it was only a little after that that I noticed the bump. Plus, I've been using my hands a lot.. typing.. gaming especially.. so it makes sense. My other hand hurts a little, too. I put an ice pack on it and it helped the pain go away for a while.

My cousin Donnie's coming today. Hopefully not 'til like midnight. I've been working on cleaning and helping out before he comes. Been working yesterday and today. I only got five hours of sleep. I'm exhausted. I'll take a nap after the Super Bowl, which I'm currently watching now. The halftime show is going to start after the next commercial. GO GIANTS! The commercials have been pretty rad. XD

Well, I'm gonna jet before it starts. Later!